8.17.99, midnite

          And then there's the
something could have happened
but didn't           
ritual:
          repetitive details
recognizing the ritual means
          self-awareness                    awareness
of self is contingent upon
          awareness of other than self
You separate being othered
across the couch          pending
I tempt the air by
          getting comfortable
but you don't snap at the bait
continue to investigate
          while I contemplate
          scratching your back or
                    grasping your hand
some invitation
a moment to take          to decide
          you retreat           and I
wonder:
          out of sense of restraint
I did not make myself clear
did not offer
          
There is rhythm in our ritual
pattern of speech
movement like familiar
even a closeness of limbs
          with no expectation
          how tempting is this
To not be owned
To explore one more thing
          
But you are gone